People have been asking me in recent weeks what I think of the Forge. They want to know what it's like and how I feel about my decision to come. As to the first question, I can't really give an answer. It's a situation I've never really been in before, something I can't fully describe to someone who hasn't done something like it. It's difficult, fun, stretching, encouraging, heavy, and uplifting all at the same time. There are difficulties, but they are ones that serve to empower and discipline me in my walk with the Lord, who has graciously given me the ability to see these difficulties in light of how He can use them.
And as for the second question, there has never been a time when I have regretted my decision to come. I have never wished I was anywhere else, except I could stand a few days to go visit some of the folks back home who I miss. The time seems like it is flying by, and I never think I've been here as long as I have. I can't believe I've only got 6 more months to be here, 6 more months until the Forge is done and I have to go back into the "real" world and be a light there. But I'm confident that when that time comes, the Lord will have shown me where I am to be next, and He will have prepared my heart and body to be a light right where I am.
10 November 2008
21 October 2008
Forge Update
It's been a few weeks since the last update.
Life at the Forge is settling into a routine, which is really not too predictable at all. Our schedule is somewhat set, but at the drop of a hat we can be told to pack our bags and be ready to go somewhere (and its always an unknown destination at that). It's great, though, to have the variety, the spontaneity--plus all the trips are baller-awesome (thats right Jimbo, I said it).
On top of all that, the lessons are starting to get really good and powerful. The classes are really starting to take off, and we are starting into the nitty-gritty of what it means to live in community, how/why we have faith (both in God and in general), and perhaps most powerfully, in learning about our identity (how it is built, and how it should be built). That class specifically is really opening my eyes to what is going on with my thoughts and perceptions about the world, and me in it.
Then there are the lessons learned outside the classroom, which may be the most powerful. Since we have been here, we have been in the process of writing a covenant which will help serve us and sanctify our time here as much as possible. It's taken 6-weeks, lots of meetings, a few moments of hurt feelings, and some awesome worship, but we finally have it. It has been interesting to see how we have been transformed simply by the process of making this covenant. We have been learning what it means to die to the self, to put others before yourself and your own "rights," how not to be a stumbling block to others of the faith, and what it means to live in a community. We have seen with our own eyes what it is to be in a relationship, to be fully invested in that relationship. We have learned that in order to have a successful relationship or community, you have to think of others before yourself. It's not about me or my rights or my preferences; it's about doing what is best for the community, about doing what will best serve and glorify God in that community/relationship (since that is what it exists for in the first place). For us, for this family of the Forge, sacrifice is no longer just a word on a page. Love is not merely a word we throw around without understanding the significance and the implications of its usage. We are learning more and more what love entails, the sacrifice (which can sometimes be extremely difficult) that is so often required for love to survive, the forgiveness that is absolutely necessary to live in close fellowship with other human beings. And all these lessons came in the first six weeks. I can't even begin to imagine where God will take me in the coming months, but know that this program and this place is a blessing which I can't even begin to describe.
I do miss everyone back home, and think of them often. I especially miss three little girls back in Georgia, who by the day are becoming less and less little, but ever dearer to my heart. If you see them, give them a hug for me--and tell them that Chris misses them a lot, and will be coming to see them as soon as he is able.
"May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ and the love of God and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all."
Life at the Forge is settling into a routine, which is really not too predictable at all. Our schedule is somewhat set, but at the drop of a hat we can be told to pack our bags and be ready to go somewhere (and its always an unknown destination at that). It's great, though, to have the variety, the spontaneity--plus all the trips are baller-awesome (thats right Jimbo, I said it).
On top of all that, the lessons are starting to get really good and powerful. The classes are really starting to take off, and we are starting into the nitty-gritty of what it means to live in community, how/why we have faith (both in God and in general), and perhaps most powerfully, in learning about our identity (how it is built, and how it should be built). That class specifically is really opening my eyes to what is going on with my thoughts and perceptions about the world, and me in it.
Then there are the lessons learned outside the classroom, which may be the most powerful. Since we have been here, we have been in the process of writing a covenant which will help serve us and sanctify our time here as much as possible. It's taken 6-weeks, lots of meetings, a few moments of hurt feelings, and some awesome worship, but we finally have it. It has been interesting to see how we have been transformed simply by the process of making this covenant. We have been learning what it means to die to the self, to put others before yourself and your own "rights," how not to be a stumbling block to others of the faith, and what it means to live in a community. We have seen with our own eyes what it is to be in a relationship, to be fully invested in that relationship. We have learned that in order to have a successful relationship or community, you have to think of others before yourself. It's not about me or my rights or my preferences; it's about doing what is best for the community, about doing what will best serve and glorify God in that community/relationship (since that is what it exists for in the first place). For us, for this family of the Forge, sacrifice is no longer just a word on a page. Love is not merely a word we throw around without understanding the significance and the implications of its usage. We are learning more and more what love entails, the sacrifice (which can sometimes be extremely difficult) that is so often required for love to survive, the forgiveness that is absolutely necessary to live in close fellowship with other human beings. And all these lessons came in the first six weeks. I can't even begin to imagine where God will take me in the coming months, but know that this program and this place is a blessing which I can't even begin to describe.
I do miss everyone back home, and think of them often. I especially miss three little girls back in Georgia, who by the day are becoming less and less little, but ever dearer to my heart. If you see them, give them a hug for me--and tell them that Chris misses them a lot, and will be coming to see them as soon as he is able.
"May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ and the love of God and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all."
23 September 2008
Foundation Statement
We've been given an interesting assignment this week for one of the classes: develop a statement which serves as our foundational statement. This is the sentence that would be written on the foundation of our life were it possible to do so. It is the statement that best describes upon what our entire identity is based, around what all our actions revolve--basically it is the motivation behind all that we do.
The next few days will be eye-opening, for sure, as I go about examining my life and developing this sentence. I know what I would like for the sentence to be, but I'm not sure if it fits just yet. I have been thinking about this the past week or so, so I have identified a sentence into which I hope to conform and develop my identity. It is the one to which I try to run every day, and by which I am trying to be guided.
Interestingly enough, this sentence has characterized the path of my life in recent years. The only reason I hesitate to call it my foundational statement just yet is my intentions in those times. Yes it has characterized many of the actions, but has it characterized my intentions, my heart behind those actions? Now that I have identified the statement through God's illumination, I am attempting to let the Spirit conform my identity to it. But I cannot say as yet how far the developing process has come. I know in the next few days much prayer, discussion and examination will shed some light on the subject. "May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ and the love of God and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all."
"Indeed I count everything as loss for the surpassing greatness of knowing Jesus Christ my Lord . . . and count them but rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ" --Philippians 3:8
The next few days will be eye-opening, for sure, as I go about examining my life and developing this sentence. I know what I would like for the sentence to be, but I'm not sure if it fits just yet. I have been thinking about this the past week or so, so I have identified a sentence into which I hope to conform and develop my identity. It is the one to which I try to run every day, and by which I am trying to be guided.
Interestingly enough, this sentence has characterized the path of my life in recent years. The only reason I hesitate to call it my foundational statement just yet is my intentions in those times. Yes it has characterized many of the actions, but has it characterized my intentions, my heart behind those actions? Now that I have identified the statement through God's illumination, I am attempting to let the Spirit conform my identity to it. But I cannot say as yet how far the developing process has come. I know in the next few days much prayer, discussion and examination will shed some light on the subject. "May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ and the love of God and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all."
"Indeed I count everything as loss for the surpassing greatness of knowing Jesus Christ my Lord . . . and count them but rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ" --Philippians 3:8
20 September 2008
Forge #5
"Who am I to lead these people?"
Lord you know how many times this question has run through my head. I’ve been wondering that since the day you called me, and I feel even less qualified now than ever. In the midst of these men of God I feel myself the least of them all.
I don’t know when or where it happened, but somewhere along the way I lost my faith in myself. I see almost fully the measure of my faults, and throw myself down in your presence in hopes you will build me p right. I have no talent or skill to offer you, no Isaac to sacrifice, except my life. My life, my energy, my breath are the only things I have to offer you. If any good for the kingdom results from my life it will be by, and because of, your hand. In our group discussion it occurred to me that I consider myself failing in so many areas, as a failure in general. The voice inside my head keeps telling me I’m a failure because of this and that, for so many reasons. I’m tired of feeling like a failure, of feeling not qualified enough, not able enough in anything I do. I know it hinders me, and I don’t want anything to hinder my service of you. Sometimes I shy away from my brothers from feelings of worthlessness, I don’t want to shy away from brotherhood, from godly men because a false sense of humility, from feeling down on myself in an unhealthy, ungodly way. I desire you and a right perspective of myself grounded in Christ.
In the midst of you and your servants here I feel so small. So many of my concerns though are focused on me and how I can’t see myself ever bringing you great glory. I focus on how I can’t write, sing or speak like this man Chewy sitting next to me, and I feel so little and worthless. But this isn’t a true kind of humility. This humility comes from my heart’s desire to be great and renowned. Teach me to be truly humble, in the way that Christ was. Show me how I can bring you glory with my life. Teach me to live for my audience of one. Help me to separate the selfish ambitions and desires of my heart from those put there by you. Fill this hole in my heart, this emptiness I try to satisfy in other ways. Teach me to love as Christ loved, to be a true servant of him and my fellow men.
“Indeed I count everything as loss for the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord.” --Philippians 3:8a
Lord you know how many times this question has run through my head. I’ve been wondering that since the day you called me, and I feel even less qualified now than ever. In the midst of these men of God I feel myself the least of them all.
I don’t know when or where it happened, but somewhere along the way I lost my faith in myself. I see almost fully the measure of my faults, and throw myself down in your presence in hopes you will build me p right. I have no talent or skill to offer you, no Isaac to sacrifice, except my life. My life, my energy, my breath are the only things I have to offer you. If any good for the kingdom results from my life it will be by, and because of, your hand. In our group discussion it occurred to me that I consider myself failing in so many areas, as a failure in general. The voice inside my head keeps telling me I’m a failure because of this and that, for so many reasons. I’m tired of feeling like a failure, of feeling not qualified enough, not able enough in anything I do. I know it hinders me, and I don’t want anything to hinder my service of you. Sometimes I shy away from my brothers from feelings of worthlessness, I don’t want to shy away from brotherhood, from godly men because a false sense of humility, from feeling down on myself in an unhealthy, ungodly way. I desire you and a right perspective of myself grounded in Christ.
In the midst of you and your servants here I feel so small. So many of my concerns though are focused on me and how I can’t see myself ever bringing you great glory. I focus on how I can’t write, sing or speak like this man Chewy sitting next to me, and I feel so little and worthless. But this isn’t a true kind of humility. This humility comes from my heart’s desire to be great and renowned. Teach me to be truly humble, in the way that Christ was. Show me how I can bring you glory with my life. Teach me to live for my audience of one. Help me to separate the selfish ambitions and desires of my heart from those put there by you. Fill this hole in my heart, this emptiness I try to satisfy in other ways. Teach me to love as Christ loved, to be a true servant of him and my fellow men.
“Indeed I count everything as loss for the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord.” --Philippians 3:8a
Forge #4
I am continually blown away by the many great friendships I have gained while here, especially in this short time. I feel truly blessed to have them around, for I know I have done nothing in my life to warrant the friendship of such amazing people. It is only by your grace that such fellowship and community have come to me, and I pray you will sustain them. So many great relationships for me have grown distant in recent months, even some of those made this summer, and I don’t want that to happen here. Sustain my friendship with these people, my brothers and sisters in Christ.
Injuries don’t really bother me that much. It can be a bummer at times because of some of the restrictions they place on certain actions, but overall I don’t mind. The main reason I dislike them is I have to sit on the sidelines. You know it is frustrating for me to be a spectator, not to be involved in the action. I don’t like having special attention paid to me because of my injury, and sometimes try to do too much on my own to maintain my self-sufficiency. I deny people the opportunity to bless me through service, and I don’t want to do that. Lord, give me the wisdom to recognize times where I can allow others to honor you through service, and accept it with gratitude and humility.
Injuries don’t really bother me that much. It can be a bummer at times because of some of the restrictions they place on certain actions, but overall I don’t mind. The main reason I dislike them is I have to sit on the sidelines. You know it is frustrating for me to be a spectator, not to be involved in the action. I don’t like having special attention paid to me because of my injury, and sometimes try to do too much on my own to maintain my self-sufficiency. I deny people the opportunity to bless me through service, and I don’t want to do that. Lord, give me the wisdom to recognize times where I can allow others to honor you through service, and accept it with gratitude and humility.
12 September 2008
Forge #3
One of the lessons I hope to be taught by You here is to be intentional about spreading the Word everywhere. Sure, surrounded by the comforting wilderness of Pine Cove I proclaim the Gospel boldly. But is that really being bold? Who is going to attack me here, the squirrels? Who is there to risk my comfort--the wind or the trees? Would I be as willing and eager to proclaim the Gospel to the waitress at Chili's? Or to the man sitting at the bar day after day? Or how about to those who are hurting in the hospital? Will I boldly tell the woman at Chili's that her real service should be to God the Father? To the man at the bar, will I say that what he really thirsts for is not in those spirits, but the Holy Spirit? Would I tell the physically ill they should seek Jesus, the healer of their soul?
I think I have grown too accustomed to, and comfortable in, the fellowship of other Christians. I have forgotten and neglected our calling to be the salt of the earth, to take Christ to the dying. I take for granted the joy it is to be in the presence of Christians. Lord may I never take for granted how great and amazing it is to be here with my fellow classmates, and all the great staff here at Pine Cove. May we be a joy to You, and through that bless each other.
"It is by the grace of God that a congregation is permitted to gather visibly in this world to share God's Word and sacrament." --Dietrich Bonhoeffer
"But God has put this Word into the mouth of men in order that it may be communicated to other men." --Dietrich Bonhoeffer
"The Christ in his own heart is weaker than the Christ in the word of his brother; his own heart is uncertain, his brother's is sure." --Dietrich Bonhoeffer
I think I have grown too accustomed to, and comfortable in, the fellowship of other Christians. I have forgotten and neglected our calling to be the salt of the earth, to take Christ to the dying. I take for granted the joy it is to be in the presence of Christians. Lord may I never take for granted how great and amazing it is to be here with my fellow classmates, and all the great staff here at Pine Cove. May we be a joy to You, and through that bless each other.
"It is by the grace of God that a congregation is permitted to gather visibly in this world to share God's Word and sacrament." --Dietrich Bonhoeffer
"But God has put this Word into the mouth of men in order that it may be communicated to other men." --Dietrich Bonhoeffer
"The Christ in his own heart is weaker than the Christ in the word of his brother; his own heart is uncertain, his brother's is sure." --Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Forge #2
"Indeed I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ." --Philippians 3:8
I just keep staring at this verse today, reading it over and over, hoping that it will become my life sentence. I don't know whether it's You or the Enemy, but I am feeling broken -- not in the usual sense, but in the sense that I just am not working right. I'm not strong enough, faithful enough, wise enough, smart enough--I don't read and study the Bible enough, not focused enough, not disciplined enough. I feel so far from the place where I think you want me, so unprepared to do the task you've set for me and live the life you have for me. How is it possible that through all my blessings I have missed so much you wanted for me? But I am encouraged by Mario Zandstra's words tonight -- you never know how the fabric of your life is woven. Weave away, my God. Weave away.
I just keep staring at this verse today, reading it over and over, hoping that it will become my life sentence. I don't know whether it's You or the Enemy, but I am feeling broken -- not in the usual sense, but in the sense that I just am not working right. I'm not strong enough, faithful enough, wise enough, smart enough--I don't read and study the Bible enough, not focused enough, not disciplined enough. I feel so far from the place where I think you want me, so unprepared to do the task you've set for me and live the life you have for me. How is it possible that through all my blessings I have missed so much you wanted for me? But I am encouraged by Mario Zandstra's words tonight -- you never know how the fabric of your life is woven. Weave away, my God. Weave away.
Forge #1
Who are you? What are you doing here?
I am a man who has been called to service, but I fell inadequate to fulfill that role. I am a man who is searching for fulfillment and love, but I spend too much time looking in the wrong places. I am a child of God, but I do not live up to that name and calling.
I am a man who has spent his whole life putting his confidence in things he could do, abilities he had. I am a man who takes too much of his identity from the words and opinions of people around him.
I want to be more than that -- I want to be strong, I want to be faithful, I want to be . . . I don't even know how to say what I want to be. But I know it's more than what I am right now.
I am a man who has been called to service, but I fell inadequate to fulfill that role. I am a man who is searching for fulfillment and love, but I spend too much time looking in the wrong places. I am a child of God, but I do not live up to that name and calling.
I am a man who has spent his whole life putting his confidence in things he could do, abilities he had. I am a man who takes too much of his identity from the words and opinions of people around him.
I want to be more than that -- I want to be strong, I want to be faithful, I want to be . . . I don't even know how to say what I want to be. But I know it's more than what I am right now.
25 August 2008
Forge in a Fortnight
Move in day is a little under a fortnight away, and I am surprisingly feeling little emotion about it all. Which is not to say that I am not looking forward to it. I can't wait to get back to the place where so much spiritual growth was wrought and see God move me even more. Maybe it is still just too far away for the emotion to really kick in -- were I to let it loose now it would most likely consume me before I made it there. And it's also not to say that there is no apprehension in my mind. At times when I think about all that is required of me, I feel a bit overwhelmed and wonder what I have gotten myself into. I was actually talking to my mom about this last night at church dinner. Like she said to me: "You are about to go through one of the hardest things in your life; but one which will cause you to emerge a brand new, better man. It's kind of like mat drills, except for your spirit. This will be your spiritual mat drills."
Couldn't have said it better myself.
(And if you are wondering what mat drills are, ask me sometime and I'll let you know. Hint: it involves the University of Georgia, football, and 5:45am. )
Couldn't have said it better myself.
(And if you are wondering what mat drills are, ask me sometime and I'll let you know. Hint: it involves the University of Georgia, football, and 5:45am. )
21 August 2008
2 Corinthians 4:16-17
"we are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not despairing; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying about in the body the dying of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body." --2 Corinthians 4:8-10
To say that my family has been dealing with some problems in recent weeks would be an understatement. I will not clutter up this page with the particulars so as not to burden any of you unnecessarily. Besides, when you have a big problem, the particulars often don't really matter. Anyways, back to the original reason for writing. I was having an especially difficult time last week when the Enemy was getting at me in a tough way. Again sparing the particulars, he was basically telling me I was a failure. There were lots of difficult circumstances surrounding my life, and because of that I must be a failure. He kept pointing out all the other people who had such better circumstances (at least from the outside), and telling me I must be failing because my circumstances were not as good. There are people off doing great things, serving God, living their dreams, achieving great goals, building friendships and relationships, and making their people proud -- and here I am living in my parents' house not doing anything, and struggling emotionally while I do so. He just kept letting me have it day after day, and the failure mentality began to creep in.
But God soon opened my eyes to this latest attack, and told me I was not failing. Sure, there may be others who are enjoying more exciting lives at the moment, and my circumstances now may be tough. But tough circumstances don't mean I'm failing. Feeling lonely doesn't mean I'm failing. Not achieving great things doesn't mean I'm failing. Failure is not in my circumstances but in my reaction to them. Because of the hope I have from God through Christ, my circumstances have much less to do with the state of my success than my attitude toward Him. The tough circumstances didn't mean I was failing. The only thing that could mean I was failing was if I gave up on my faith. But as I looked back I found that those difficult moments weren't driving me away, but actually driving me closer and closer. By the grace of God, I found myself clinging to Him in those moments when things seemed ready to crash down. And I found in Him a strength that survives and supports even when everything else fails. I was not failing because the Rock on which I am built never fails.
The Pharisees thought Jesus failed when He died because they thought His death prevented Him from becoming Messiah. But the thing they thought proved Him a failure was actually the very thing that made Him a success. To them His death was failure at achieving His goal; but to Him, it was success because it enabled Him to achieve His goal: the salvation of our souls. Likewise, this struggling which the Enemy points out as my failure is not my failure. My difficult circumstances are not failure at achieving my goal, but are actually those which are enabling me to achieve my goal: honoring God through the perfecting of my faith. Success is not necessarily found in thriving circumstances, as some people in our world would like me to think, but in the perfecting of my faith, in my soul being made more and more like Christ. This is the purpose of my life, because as I become more and more like Christ I bring more and more glory to God. And so long as I am on that path, my circumstances make no matter. Failure is not in the circumstances but in my reaction to them. I am so thankful today to serve a God who has power enough to sustain me through all things; who has wisdom enough to orchestrate the perfecting of my faith through such difficult circumstances; and who has love enough to forgive me when I actually do fail.
"Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day. For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison" --2 Corinthians 4:16-17
To say that my family has been dealing with some problems in recent weeks would be an understatement. I will not clutter up this page with the particulars so as not to burden any of you unnecessarily. Besides, when you have a big problem, the particulars often don't really matter. Anyways, back to the original reason for writing. I was having an especially difficult time last week when the Enemy was getting at me in a tough way. Again sparing the particulars, he was basically telling me I was a failure. There were lots of difficult circumstances surrounding my life, and because of that I must be a failure. He kept pointing out all the other people who had such better circumstances (at least from the outside), and telling me I must be failing because my circumstances were not as good. There are people off doing great things, serving God, living their dreams, achieving great goals, building friendships and relationships, and making their people proud -- and here I am living in my parents' house not doing anything, and struggling emotionally while I do so. He just kept letting me have it day after day, and the failure mentality began to creep in.
But God soon opened my eyes to this latest attack, and told me I was not failing. Sure, there may be others who are enjoying more exciting lives at the moment, and my circumstances now may be tough. But tough circumstances don't mean I'm failing. Feeling lonely doesn't mean I'm failing. Not achieving great things doesn't mean I'm failing. Failure is not in my circumstances but in my reaction to them. Because of the hope I have from God through Christ, my circumstances have much less to do with the state of my success than my attitude toward Him. The tough circumstances didn't mean I was failing. The only thing that could mean I was failing was if I gave up on my faith. But as I looked back I found that those difficult moments weren't driving me away, but actually driving me closer and closer. By the grace of God, I found myself clinging to Him in those moments when things seemed ready to crash down. And I found in Him a strength that survives and supports even when everything else fails. I was not failing because the Rock on which I am built never fails.
The Pharisees thought Jesus failed when He died because they thought His death prevented Him from becoming Messiah. But the thing they thought proved Him a failure was actually the very thing that made Him a success. To them His death was failure at achieving His goal; but to Him, it was success because it enabled Him to achieve His goal: the salvation of our souls. Likewise, this struggling which the Enemy points out as my failure is not my failure. My difficult circumstances are not failure at achieving my goal, but are actually those which are enabling me to achieve my goal: honoring God through the perfecting of my faith. Success is not necessarily found in thriving circumstances, as some people in our world would like me to think, but in the perfecting of my faith, in my soul being made more and more like Christ. This is the purpose of my life, because as I become more and more like Christ I bring more and more glory to God. And so long as I am on that path, my circumstances make no matter. Failure is not in the circumstances but in my reaction to them. I am so thankful today to serve a God who has power enough to sustain me through all things; who has wisdom enough to orchestrate the perfecting of my faith through such difficult circumstances; and who has love enough to forgive me when I actually do fail.
"Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day. For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison" --2 Corinthians 4:16-17
10 August 2008
Colossians 3:23-24
I was moving out of my apartment in Athens last week, and a realization suddenly occurred to me: somehow I wound up doing a lot of extra work to get the apartment ready for move out inspection. Mostly this was due to the fact I was the last one there, and the others had to move out in haste. And it's not like I had to make major repairs or anything; but I started feeling wronged nonetheless. Our wonderful Enemy began to whisper in my ear that this was a great injustice--why should I have to do all this extra work? I listened to this voice for a bit, but then the Spirit began to whisper a little louder. Through God's grace I found myself listening more and more to the Spirit and not the Enemy. And like He usually does, I found the Spirit whispering Truth that silenced the lies and stopped the Enemy in his tracks.
As I emerged from this little episode in my life, I saw God teaching me something: simply put, there are some tasks in life which are not glamorous nor glorious, but they must be done. There is no fanfare for finishing, nor any glory in the going, but it must be completed nonetheless. No one will see you selflessly slaving away, nor will they say thank you when the task is ended. But the job must be done. It's tough going sometimes in those moments, but in the end it is good for us to have to do these types of jobs. For one thing, it teaches us to appreciate the "thank you's" we do receive. We learn the beauty and value in a simple "good job," especially when we've had to do some gross and difficult things without even a second glance. And if earthly "thank you's" have a sweeter sound, how much sweeter still will it be to hear the eternal God say "Well done, good and faithful servant." Regardless we can take solace in the fact that God is watching, and He is taking note of every task completed in His name ("And the King will answer them, 'Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.'" --Matthew 25:40).
But more than that, rejoice in the perfecting of your faith that God brings about in these moments ("so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ;" --1 Peter 1:7). What great humility can we learn through completing such tasks, through suffering and serving in silence. We learn to tune in totally to our audience of one -- to pay attention to God's attention and no other. We learn the heart of our Savior, "who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross." --Philippians 2:6-8) -- and allow Him to grow a little bit of His humility in us. Oh that His humility would take over my heart and mind until I am consumed in His grace! May I become like David -- a man after God's own heart.
"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving." --Colossians 3:23
As I emerged from this little episode in my life, I saw God teaching me something: simply put, there are some tasks in life which are not glamorous nor glorious, but they must be done. There is no fanfare for finishing, nor any glory in the going, but it must be completed nonetheless. No one will see you selflessly slaving away, nor will they say thank you when the task is ended. But the job must be done. It's tough going sometimes in those moments, but in the end it is good for us to have to do these types of jobs. For one thing, it teaches us to appreciate the "thank you's" we do receive. We learn the beauty and value in a simple "good job," especially when we've had to do some gross and difficult things without even a second glance. And if earthly "thank you's" have a sweeter sound, how much sweeter still will it be to hear the eternal God say "Well done, good and faithful servant." Regardless we can take solace in the fact that God is watching, and He is taking note of every task completed in His name ("And the King will answer them, 'Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.'" --Matthew 25:40).
But more than that, rejoice in the perfecting of your faith that God brings about in these moments ("so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ;" --1 Peter 1:7). What great humility can we learn through completing such tasks, through suffering and serving in silence. We learn to tune in totally to our audience of one -- to pay attention to God's attention and no other. We learn the heart of our Savior, "who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross." --Philippians 2:6-8) -- and allow Him to grow a little bit of His humility in us. Oh that His humility would take over my heart and mind until I am consumed in His grace! May I become like David -- a man after God's own heart.
"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving." --Colossians 3:23
04 April 2008
Philippians 3:7-8
These past few years I've been struggling with my self-worth, being angry with God, at times, for leading me away from the sports that I love doing (and which gave me a certain amount of confidence in myself). I wondered why He wouldn't allow me to continue in these endeavors, and use any respect or renown they gave me as a platform from which I could proclaim the message of Christ crucified; but also, as a way of providing me confidence in myself and my abilities as an able and worthy servant of God. But after reading some of Paul's words to the Corinthians, I am realizing that such is not how God wants me--feeling confident and capable in my own ability to preach the message. I shouldn't build myself up through confidence in my knowledge, athleticism, or oratory. All these skills are weak because they all can be taken away, and are therefore shaky grounds on which to build a foundation of the mind. Even if done for the right reasons, building one's confidence on skills of the flesh is dangerous and deadly because they all can, and will eventually, be taken away. I can lose my knowledge. I will lose my body and athletic aptitude as I age. I could develop a stutter and lose my oratorical prowess. And then, I've lost not only those talents, but also the confidence in myself and my ability to serve God, which leaves me reeling from the pain of loss of talent, and worse, loss of identity.
But when I consider myself nothing more than a clay vessel, a privy pot, and instead focus on merely preaching the message of Christ crucified, and Him risen; relying on God to do the plowwork of the Spirit; and put any confidence for myself in the power of the Spirit; then I find myself on much stronger ground. For the power of God never wanes nor fades, and I will never lose heart for myself or this world when my confidence and identity is found in the eternal God alone. I can then always move forward as a child of God, and do infinitely more work to the glory of His Name.
"But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ" --Philippians 3:7-8
But when I consider myself nothing more than a clay vessel, a privy pot, and instead focus on merely preaching the message of Christ crucified, and Him risen; relying on God to do the plowwork of the Spirit; and put any confidence for myself in the power of the Spirit; then I find myself on much stronger ground. For the power of God never wanes nor fades, and I will never lose heart for myself or this world when my confidence and identity is found in the eternal God alone. I can then always move forward as a child of God, and do infinitely more work to the glory of His Name.
"But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ" --Philippians 3:7-8
13 February 2008
II Corinthians 7:9-10
"I now rejoice, not that you were made sorrowful, but that you were made sorrowful to the point of repentance; for you were made sorrowful according to the will of God, so that you might not suffer loss in anything through us." --II Corinthians 7:9
When we feel at our worst, we're really at our best because it is then that we are most willing and able to turn to God for direction and for strength. It is then we are most willing to sacrifice our own selfish desires in order to follow God, and then when we are most able to feel the all-powerful strength of God. We know at that moment we will always have the strength to endure, and always have a direction in which to go. And so to all of us who are feeling low in the world, let us rejoice, or at least take solace, in the fact that we are primed for spiritual growth. We have a wonderful opportunity at our feet to lay aside the desires of the world, and instead turn to the desires of our God. While we are broken down, let us build ourselves up right -- by not building at all, but by letting God make us into His new creation, so that we might move forward to new wars, and not insist on remaining in the same rut fighting the same old battles.
"For the sorrow that is according to the will of God produces a repentance without regret, leading to salvation, but the sorrow of the world produces death." --II Corinthians 7:10
12 February 2008
Proverbs 3:5-6
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." --Proverbs 3:5-6
It's a scary thing for most of us to examine our hearts and lives because I think most all of us have things which we put our joy in other than God, be they talents, objects or affections. It's an easy trap to fall into, happening right under our noses yet without our knowledge. We must, then, as dedicated believers in the faith, daily examine ourselves and our priorities in order to determine from where our joy comes. Some might think this is a tiny mistake to make or fault to have, and in some respects it is. But putting joy in objects other than God, no matter how small, is dangerous for two reasons: one, it will provide immense pain and discomfort over a loss of this joy, and perhaps a resulting loss of confidence; and two, it can prove to be a slippery slope if not held in constant check, leading us to put more and more confidence in the thing, while leading us away from God, the true source of our joy. And the bottom to which this slippery slope leads is not one we should be aspiring to reach.
It's a scary thing for most of us to examine our hearts and lives because I think most all of us have things which we put our joy in other than God, be they talents, objects or affections. It's an easy trap to fall into, happening right under our noses yet without our knowledge. We must, then, as dedicated believers in the faith, daily examine ourselves and our priorities in order to determine from where our joy comes. Some might think this is a tiny mistake to make or fault to have, and in some respects it is. But putting joy in objects other than God, no matter how small, is dangerous for two reasons: one, it will provide immense pain and discomfort over a loss of this joy, and perhaps a resulting loss of confidence; and two, it can prove to be a slippery slope if not held in constant check, leading us to put more and more confidence in the thing, while leading us away from God, the true source of our joy. And the bottom to which this slippery slope leads is not one we should be aspiring to reach.
The Way We Were
The way we used to go, and the men we used to be,
are but fading memories I can barely see.
Are we now better men
than we were way back when;
or the better days will we no longer see?
It's a question I often find myself thinking;
and my bravado, I find it slowly shrinking.
That powerful man I thought was me
was nothing more than a flashing dream,
and disappears further the more I keep blinking.
Underneath the facade I find the man I've been aching to be
struggling to break out and grow into it's tree.
With a firm reliance on my God,
I slowly take to this new path I trod,
hoping only to draw closer to Him who set me free.
But my mind, it still wanders itself back to then,
when we thought we had finally become men.
The youth in our eyes
couldn't help us to realize
Manhood is a long journey we had yet to begin.
are but fading memories I can barely see.
Are we now better men
than we were way back when;
or the better days will we no longer see?
It's a question I often find myself thinking;
and my bravado, I find it slowly shrinking.
That powerful man I thought was me
was nothing more than a flashing dream,
and disappears further the more I keep blinking.
Underneath the facade I find the man I've been aching to be
struggling to break out and grow into it's tree.
With a firm reliance on my God,
I slowly take to this new path I trod,
hoping only to draw closer to Him who set me free.
But my mind, it still wanders itself back to then,
when we thought we had finally become men.
The youth in our eyes
couldn't help us to realize
Manhood is a long journey we had yet to begin.
11 February 2008
A Message of Hope -- I Corinthians 2.9
"When a wicked man dies, his expectation will perish, and the hope of strong men perishes." --Proverbs 11:7
It's funny sometimes to think about how God works. Funny in a good kind of way. Suffice it to say, I was struggling last week with hope. I had my good moments and my bad moments, but overall I felt like I was being tossed back and forth too much. I wondered how it was my hope was so small that it would fluctuate so quickly and so drastically. I was like a tiny ship being tossed about by the winds and surf of a storm. Little did I know that I was struggling because I was putting my hope in the wrong place. Last Sunday when I went to church, I felt like God was talking straight to me, both in the service and in Sunday school. Believe it or not, the topic for the service was about hope--specifically, putting your hope in the right place, or the right kind of hope. Then when I went to Sunday school, the lesson was about "preparing for rain"--how when you pray, you should go out and work to be ready for the blessing you are seeking. If you are a farmer and need rain, in addition to praying for rain, you also have to go out and prepare your field to receive the rain. That shows that you are truly believing God to answer your prayer. I laughed to myself both times I found out the topics, and smiled thinking how great is the God we serve.
I am learning, slowly but surely, by the grace of our Lord, what it means to have the right kind of hope. I was looking for a sure hope that God would answer my prayer; and would grow discouraged when I realized that I could find no such assurance. My hope seemed to fail me at the time when I needed it the most, because I was putting my hope in God to answer my prayer and give me this blessing. And though answered prayer is part of our hope in God, it cannot, and should not, be the totality of our hope, for that is much too small an expectation for our God. The hope we have from Him, and which is afforded to us through our Savior Jesus Christ, when spoken of in the Bible, is a hope that surpasses all other promises, and carries us through all of our trials. Hope, in the New Testament, is almost always spoken of in reference to our salvation, the riches of Heaven that Christ provides for us. It can carry us through because it is not limited to deliverance from our present trial. "If only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are to be pitied more than all men" (Icorinthians15:19). For we all will eventually endure a trial for which no deliverance will come, and death will result. If our hope is only in God for deliverance in this life, then on that day we will believe the Lord has failed us. Really, though, we were merely believing in Him wrongly.
But since the hope we have in Christ goes beyond this life to an eternity spent in His presence, we have hope through all our trials, no matter if deliverance comes or not. Thus, as long as I set my hope on the righteousness God has promised me through Christ, then I will always have joy, and always have strength to endure. I have enough joy to live out Philippians 1:27: "Whatever happens, conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ."
"Surely there is a future, and your hope will not be cut off." --Proverbs 23:18
It's funny sometimes to think about how God works. Funny in a good kind of way. Suffice it to say, I was struggling last week with hope. I had my good moments and my bad moments, but overall I felt like I was being tossed back and forth too much. I wondered how it was my hope was so small that it would fluctuate so quickly and so drastically. I was like a tiny ship being tossed about by the winds and surf of a storm. Little did I know that I was struggling because I was putting my hope in the wrong place. Last Sunday when I went to church, I felt like God was talking straight to me, both in the service and in Sunday school. Believe it or not, the topic for the service was about hope--specifically, putting your hope in the right place, or the right kind of hope. Then when I went to Sunday school, the lesson was about "preparing for rain"--how when you pray, you should go out and work to be ready for the blessing you are seeking. If you are a farmer and need rain, in addition to praying for rain, you also have to go out and prepare your field to receive the rain. That shows that you are truly believing God to answer your prayer. I laughed to myself both times I found out the topics, and smiled thinking how great is the God we serve.
I am learning, slowly but surely, by the grace of our Lord, what it means to have the right kind of hope. I was looking for a sure hope that God would answer my prayer; and would grow discouraged when I realized that I could find no such assurance. My hope seemed to fail me at the time when I needed it the most, because I was putting my hope in God to answer my prayer and give me this blessing. And though answered prayer is part of our hope in God, it cannot, and should not, be the totality of our hope, for that is much too small an expectation for our God. The hope we have from Him, and which is afforded to us through our Savior Jesus Christ, when spoken of in the Bible, is a hope that surpasses all other promises, and carries us through all of our trials. Hope, in the New Testament, is almost always spoken of in reference to our salvation, the riches of Heaven that Christ provides for us. It can carry us through because it is not limited to deliverance from our present trial. "If only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are to be pitied more than all men" (Icorinthians15:19). For we all will eventually endure a trial for which no deliverance will come, and death will result. If our hope is only in God for deliverance in this life, then on that day we will believe the Lord has failed us. Really, though, we were merely believing in Him wrongly.
But since the hope we have in Christ goes beyond this life to an eternity spent in His presence, we have hope through all our trials, no matter if deliverance comes or not. Thus, as long as I set my hope on the righteousness God has promised me through Christ, then I will always have joy, and always have strength to endure. I have enough joy to live out Philippians 1:27: "Whatever happens, conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ."
"Surely there is a future, and your hope will not be cut off." --Proverbs 23:18
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